When I was younger I was a bit of a hoarder. I think we all are to some extent unless you’re incredibly intentional about not being one. People like things. The rush of buying things, the instant gratification we can receive from making purchases without even leaving our homes. There’s nothing wrong with enjoying things. But I’m going to be honest with you and tell you a little secret about myself.
Things physically give me anxiety.
Like I said earlier, I was kind of a hoarder when I was little. A collector of all sorts of junk. My surfaces were filled, my drawers were overflowing, and my closet....oh my closet.
The habits from my younger self left a bad taste in my mouth for having things. When I was a freshman in High School I finally purged the things I thought had “sentimental value”, but turned out to merely be junk in my closet. I cleaned up my act and became a clutter-free bedroom-occupier in my parents’ home. Everything finally had a place to reside and I was comfortable with my decision. I felt grateful, blessed and finally at peace.
Then we moved from my childhood home which forced me to purge even more. Seeing all the bins and boxes it took to carry all my possessions discouraged me since I thought I had surpassed the headache of purging already. There was still work to be done. A LOT of work. I felt embarrassed to be holding on to so much for the short life I’ve lived so far.
The thing I like about moving is that it forces you to rethink your possessions. I had a new, empty closet that I did not have to put all my clothes away into. I decided to take this opportunity to live out of the bins and boxes in my room and only put away the clothes I found myself looking for. I gave away the clothes that I didn’t want or had forgotten about and I took pride in that process.
Life was good and everything had a place, yet I still battled with myself that I had too much stuff. I convinced myself that as long as everything had a place I wouldn’t worry about it.
Fast forward to my most recent move. The big move. The move out from under my parents’ roof and I have a confession to make…I’m am terrible at packing. Compartmentalizing is not my forte and packing up all my belongings was extremely difficult for me. My mind was focused on getting everything from one destination to another, and I wasn’t thinking about how many trips it might take. I ended up packing so terribly that I had half-filled boxes and no reasonable order to which I had packed. Needless to say I unintentionally made it look like I had more things than I actually had. Which stressed. me. out.
I have too many clothes, but not because I have a shopping problem. I have too many clothes because I just keep them. I still have clothes from middle school/early high school. I don’t know how to “fashion” and I certainly don’t enjoy buying clothes for myself, so I just don’t. My clothes are out of style and I have way too many of them.
I have too many products. I like to try new products, test the waters and get creative. But I change my routine so much that I just have a collection of products that I don’t use anymore.
I have so many shoes and accessories. I! ONLY! WEAR! ONE! PAIR! OF! SHOES! PER! SEASON! Yet I still rely on my future self to count on me for saving shoes for god knows what event (nothing…I don’t go anywhere but coffee shops and concerts).
Why am I like this?
This post is not a rant. In fact, it’s to help motivate you so in return I can be motivated as well. Helping others helps me. Declaring to the world that I am going to do something about my frustrating qualities will motivate me to actually go through with doing something about it. So here it is…
I have always wanted to be a minimalist. Not like a real minimalist ( I need more than one shirt and that’s final) but definitely to the point where I don’t look like I live in clutter town, if you catch my drift. I would like to start a mini blog series and take you with me on this journey of minimizing my life one category at a time. I will share my frustrations, my weaknesses, my victories and hope that all of the above will motivate you (or make you laugh) in the process.
This will be my life over the next few weeks and I will be committing to the decluttering of my space. And what better time of year to embark on this journey to organized living than “spring cleaning” season? Happy Monday, and happy cleaning!